Future

I think I've been writing this particular blog entry in my head for a few months. 

The ideas and concepts have been circulating around since the summer. An epiphany at Chester pride helped bridge a mental block and weeks of sitting around during my surgery rehabilitation also helped with the processing of my thoughts. Unlike previous recent blogs this one has had a bit of thought and rewrite before publication. 

On the good news front and before I hit the substance of this post (which may or may not be the final one of the year) I recently did my final trip back to my consultant for my three month post op check. He was happy with the results and essentially discharged me. 

So the main medical work is done. Breast augmentation remains a possibility but they appear to be still growing so not a priority. Hopefully won't have the need 

However returning to the main focus of this post namely having to all intents and purposes completed my transition where now 

As I said I've had time to think....a lot and 2023 is looking like a sea change in approach and outlook.

The big work is done. That really has been my focus for a few years now so there is no planning or blocks in place anymore.

So 2023 will very much be a year of change 

Firstly over the last few years I've found a voice I didn't think I had. It was me but buried. I feel liberated and chains smashed. This blog was only the start and doing talks etc have really helped my expression. With my new role in LCR Pride Foundation I am going to be more vocal about my communities rights. 

I'll continue blogging but as well as being about my experience it will contain more opinions and views. 

I'm also looking at vlogging. I've set up a tiktok account, changed my handle on both Instagram and YouTube. I'm going to do things that interest me and again will reflect my views and elements in my community. Twitter night be getting dumped. Toxic pit of hate that it is I have better ways to get my stuff out there.

Keep an eye out for @amandaoutthere.

I feel a need to be more vocal as the challenges to my community exist and remain a threat. I can now longer rely upon others to ensure our future so I'll be making sure my voice is heard and loudly.

That means getting out, mixing, socialising and networking a lot more. Where in the past I'd be more reticent to commit, I've decided in 2023 that the default will be yes. Already got a few ideas going and arranged so keep an eye on here.

That hopefully will mean more acquaintances and friendships. I've found on this journey who is and isn't important to me. Whilst Ill focus on those who stood by me etc I'll also be making a conscious effort to get out more. Feel free to tag along but I'll be less reserved and more willing to hit things head on. 

I have needs, desires and a real urge to really let loose. I'm very very tired of hiding, worrying what others thing and fearing just being myself. 01.01.23 that ends. I'm going to be me full on.

As part of my new approach I intend to travel more both national and international to see and experience new things. I'm planning more than a few trips this year ahead and me being me will form part of my social media strategy. They will differ to try and get a different view point and experience.

Even this last year I've realised how being transgender when out and about provokes different reactions. I'm going to be open about that and document trips more visually and openly. I'm really looking forward to just throwing caution to the wind and engaging with loads of different people and experiences. If I want to do something I'm just going to do it. Be that on my own or with others.

Less hang ups more hanging out lol.

This process of what is over five years has taken me physically and mentally through a lot. It has been very tiring and yet each hurdle successfully completed felt like another shackle broken. It's been very much a metamorphic process. 

I am now ready. I'm who I am and I'm not going to hide it anymore.

So where is that first tattoo going to be.....hmmmmm . Maybe just a discrete little one.

This might not be the last blog of this year but certainly the last before Christmas. I'll take this opportunity therefore to wish you all a fantastic festive period. 

I hope you enjoy it however you intend to spend it.

Take care

@amandaoutthere.