Serious face time
Hi all,
Think in colloquial terms this is described as the business end of things
Safely ensconced in my dads house and just waiting for the legal work on my new place to conclude. I have said before that I very much want to hit the ground running. Work is a complicating factor in that the job requires me to sign stuff but I cant sign stuff legally until my new identity is in place. It's not like getting a new name badge and different uniform.
I cant start the process of my new formal legal identity until officially my divorce comes through and with the other side managing to mess up the paperwork each time and Liverpool Family court having about a 6 week backlog as you can imagine that is taking a bit of time.
However thoughts have turned now to the last vestiges of telling people before I go full time at laest at my new place, supermarket socializing etc.
3 distinct groups remained. Football, kids and extended family. In terms of priority previously the kids came first , footy and then if and when aunties / cousins etc.
Have dipped a toe in the footy crowd and picked a couple of bods. One I thought was mature, intelligent and probably level headed enough to take it all in. Seems I called that right. Other was a close friend and she has been excellent.
One thing that has come out of coming out is the way people describe my being transgender. It has invariably been "the thing" "it" "the decision" "the you know what" and also known as "the you know".
Okay as cool as I am about it being called my transition, i think if you just refer to it as either the or your "change" then we have the basis covered. I'll know what you mean.
So back to the final bits. I still feel when i am at a match a bit uneasy about coming out. Call it the final frontier etc but i think i may sneak into an away game incognito first. Build up to a home game but tell everyone well in advance. There are some bigots and very backward thinking people at football even at the low level I go. Will be a tough thing going to the match as Amanda.
As for the kids, well we are coming up to 2 weeks since we parted. I have tried to contact them with no reply and have no idea where they are living. Its sad but 2 years of no birthday or Christmas cards / wishes means it doesn't really come as a surprise. Im not sure if the WWOTW has told them but regardless it takes a pretty twisted mind to cut your kids off from a parent. So be it. I'll give it a few more weeks and if not then i'll work on the basis that they wont be part of my life in the near future and thus they then fall into the general family category for finding out. I cannot put my life on hold or pause anymore.
So I return to the theme of this blog. Reality bites. That probably is a bit flippant or melodramatic way of saving I have to get my serious head on and start looking at the nuances and minutiae.
I am in a customer focused job and have bit up a lot of contacts over the years. Some sort of micro blog my cover them pre change over. Something more formal at higher levels of the firm and clients appears likely. New photo id for work and new e-mail address / business cards. Linkedin will need to be updated and new name plate for the desk plus all the log ins for IT need to be changed. Quite a big change really.
Once i get the deed poll change then copies sent to the 4 corners of the world for all legal changes with everyone else and that puts my new name on everything I have. Be interesting to see how certain organizations cope with it. Some I suspect will be geared up more than others.
I can then start on the physical changes with hormones etc. Still need a flipping hair cut first lol.
In the interim e-bay and shopping is still a delight. Got a nice big Autograph spotted blouse, faux leather skirt from Lipsy and a fabulous part of flat boots with sequin inserts on the ankle. Black heels and a pink raincoat on their way. Bit more jewellery added and i think i am absolutely there.
So in summary, I think its time to start the ground work once I have a move in date for my house. For those close to me a house warming as Amanda will be a good introduction. I've also registered with a couple of dating apps - Badoo and Ok Cupid. Like the former rather than the latter so see what happens there. Early days yet.
In the interim as we are closing in on d-day feel free to ask away
Love and hugs
Amanda
xxx
Think in colloquial terms this is described as the business end of things
Safely ensconced in my dads house and just waiting for the legal work on my new place to conclude. I have said before that I very much want to hit the ground running. Work is a complicating factor in that the job requires me to sign stuff but I cant sign stuff legally until my new identity is in place. It's not like getting a new name badge and different uniform.
I cant start the process of my new formal legal identity until officially my divorce comes through and with the other side managing to mess up the paperwork each time and Liverpool Family court having about a 6 week backlog as you can imagine that is taking a bit of time.
However thoughts have turned now to the last vestiges of telling people before I go full time at laest at my new place, supermarket socializing etc.
3 distinct groups remained. Football, kids and extended family. In terms of priority previously the kids came first , footy and then if and when aunties / cousins etc.
Have dipped a toe in the footy crowd and picked a couple of bods. One I thought was mature, intelligent and probably level headed enough to take it all in. Seems I called that right. Other was a close friend and she has been excellent.
One thing that has come out of coming out is the way people describe my being transgender. It has invariably been "the thing" "it" "the decision" "the you know what" and also known as "the you know".
Okay as cool as I am about it being called my transition, i think if you just refer to it as either the or your "change" then we have the basis covered. I'll know what you mean.
So back to the final bits. I still feel when i am at a match a bit uneasy about coming out. Call it the final frontier etc but i think i may sneak into an away game incognito first. Build up to a home game but tell everyone well in advance. There are some bigots and very backward thinking people at football even at the low level I go. Will be a tough thing going to the match as Amanda.
As for the kids, well we are coming up to 2 weeks since we parted. I have tried to contact them with no reply and have no idea where they are living. Its sad but 2 years of no birthday or Christmas cards / wishes means it doesn't really come as a surprise. Im not sure if the WWOTW has told them but regardless it takes a pretty twisted mind to cut your kids off from a parent. So be it. I'll give it a few more weeks and if not then i'll work on the basis that they wont be part of my life in the near future and thus they then fall into the general family category for finding out. I cannot put my life on hold or pause anymore.
So I return to the theme of this blog. Reality bites. That probably is a bit flippant or melodramatic way of saving I have to get my serious head on and start looking at the nuances and minutiae.
I am in a customer focused job and have bit up a lot of contacts over the years. Some sort of micro blog my cover them pre change over. Something more formal at higher levels of the firm and clients appears likely. New photo id for work and new e-mail address / business cards. Linkedin will need to be updated and new name plate for the desk plus all the log ins for IT need to be changed. Quite a big change really.
Once i get the deed poll change then copies sent to the 4 corners of the world for all legal changes with everyone else and that puts my new name on everything I have. Be interesting to see how certain organizations cope with it. Some I suspect will be geared up more than others.
I can then start on the physical changes with hormones etc. Still need a flipping hair cut first lol.
In the interim e-bay and shopping is still a delight. Got a nice big Autograph spotted blouse, faux leather skirt from Lipsy and a fabulous part of flat boots with sequin inserts on the ankle. Black heels and a pink raincoat on their way. Bit more jewellery added and i think i am absolutely there.
So in summary, I think its time to start the ground work once I have a move in date for my house. For those close to me a house warming as Amanda will be a good introduction. I've also registered with a couple of dating apps - Badoo and Ok Cupid. Like the former rather than the latter so see what happens there. Early days yet.
In the interim as we are closing in on d-day feel free to ask away
Love and hugs
Amanda
xxx
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