Didn't quite get there

Ok so the plan was to summarize at the end of last year. Didn't get around to it despite Omni curtailing my activities. Since the last blog it's been non stop booze and food so time to look forward now I think.

That my mantra now. Forward and positive. No more sitting in on my own. Finally got to my local over Christmas and nice little place it is. A few other bars and restaurants to visit I think in the vicinity in the coming months.

Physically I'm post 12 months on hormones. This is all permanent now and I am so starting to love my body now. There are curves and shapes forming. I feel sexy, vibrant and it's given me a personality confidence boost. Its difficult to put into words but I feel more comfortable being considered an object of desire. Previously I've never been comfortable with being liked or others being attracted to me because I never loved me. That's changed. Not fully there but it's well on the way 

I mentioned in the past downgrading my prosthesis in light of growth. I can now fill a few bras I have. Not comfortably fill but no excess material. This is an amazing feeling. My own body doing its thing and having to lift / position it to fit / fill . Body confidence is on the rise. The aches and itching are all bearable in the knowledge of what's happening.

That's lead to a change in my fashion sense as well. I've always bought smart, classy but a tad conservative. No plunging necklines for obvious reasons. That's going to change as things develop. It will be age appropriate but I want to look more attractive and accentuate what is growing.

I've always had an attachment to vintage clothing and style. Classic lines but also certain era's such as the 50s. Those who have seen me in work in my green belted dress might have guessed that's a 50s replica. I'm definitely going to explore that more. I know from some underwear I have of that era and replicas that they do enhance my body a fair bit. As it develops further it will hopefully be shaped by that underwear and clothing. Again it's all about body confidence.

So it's a new year and all that. I've made some changes and resolutions but I'll keep them to myself. See if you can spot them. In part it's just the continued development of me. That will include telling my story and standing up for my community more. That will include a more relaxed me and hopefully more fun. It will certainly see me really embracing the changes. 

This year has some really big potential. If you are only tuning in now, I hope you enjoy the rest of the journey with me. I hope that this year will be momentous and I won't shy from all the good and bad bits. This is my journey and unique to me but parallels between this and others in my community are there to be drawn.

Whilst these are my plans and intent, you are welcome to join me on the years ups and downs. Trust me it will be fun. 

One thing I ask all readers to take forward in the New Year is to continue to listen without prejudice. Most readers had no idea I was hiding all this. There are plenty more out there just like me.

May your year be the best it can be. See you soon

Amanda xx